Drowsy.

So I wasn't very smart last night and decided to stay up until 3:30 talking on MSN and reading in bed, knowing very well that I had to get up at 9:00 the next morning (as in, this morning) for church. I took an idea from a class-napper who recently got busted for drifting off during Writing and Reporting and quickly downed a can of Red Bull before service, which did the trick when it came to the sermon this morning, but now I feel rather like an insomniac -- tired and as hell, but, alas, unable to sleep. This could explain the run-on sentences. It's strange, because I never have trouble with keeping my caffeine in check and more often then not, I have more of a problem quitting than encouraging my addiction; but right now, I'm just ... spent.

So no Top 5 list for today, I'm afraid, because I can't get the brain power (or enough energy in my arms to reach over to the mouse and browse through my iTunes list).

However, I do believe a mini-rant is in order.

Okay, so when has it become a job for people to sneer at others who may be carrying their groceries in, heaven forbid!, a plastic bag?? Don't get me wrong, I'm as environmentally inclined as the next person, but let's say I just popped in for a surprise visit to Loblaws, having had no time to stop home and pick up my tote bags. Does that really warrant the death-glare and the "turn-to-friend-and-say-something-snarky-about-plastic-bags"? I kid you not, arms full of groceries, rushing to get home, I get sidestepped by a woman and her friend, who give me the bitchy kind of glance-overs and in passing, I hear her dramatically sigh and say (quite loudly), "You'd think more people would have switched to cloth bags by now....mutter mutter... Global Warming" (the 'mutter mutter' was due to a store alarm going off at a nearby shop). Now here's the thing: I wasn't walking out of the Loblaws with fifty bags for six apples. There was no excessive double-bagging (or any at all). I had three bags for a hefty amount of groceries, and this woman finds it necessary to pour a pail of condescension over my head from her oh-so-high pedestal? Believe me, I usually have my reusable bags with me when I can, and I do understand the importance of spreading awareness about the well-being of our planet, but there must be better ways than the off-the-hand, holier-than-thou 10-second sermon. Otherwise Al Gore wouldn't have spent all that time and money with "An Inconvenient Truth".

So please, all the snappy women of the world who have jumped on the latest enviro-trend, get off your high horses. If you've got something to say, make it tasteful, or everyone will just keep thinking you're a bitch.

That's my rant. I think I'll take another shot at a nap.

And now that that's over...

Top 5 Favourite "Recently Added" Tracks On My iTunes:
5) Pull Shapes - The Pipettes
4) Gotta Have You - The Weepies
3) Neptune City - Nicole Atkins
2) Deacon Blues - Steely Dan
1) I Can't Get Next To You - The Temptations

Now you go.

Not studying Shakespeare.

Top 5 Songs To Dance To:
5) Put Your Records On - Corinne Bailey Rae
4) My Love (ft. TI) - Justin Timberlake
3) Signed, Sealed, Delivered - Stevie Wonder
2) Billie Jean - Michael Jackson
1) Direct Me - Otis Redding

I've spent the day in my pyjama pants and my old-man cardigan, tribal dancing 'round my Christmas tree to Otis Redding, and watching The Tudors on CBC (everyone get on that! It's sexy, it's dramatic, it's Henry VIII; this time, sizzlin'ly hot and makin' love - makin' love! - with every waiting woman while waging war on Italy!).

This is kind of weird, the grey area between the end of classes and actual Christmas vacation (because I've got one more exam), probably made weirder by the fact that I'm home. Right now, I'm staying in, telling myself that I'm going to work hard and study my ass off, but in the end, I'll look back on my day and realize that I've only spent about 1/8th of the time studying, the other 7/8ths on Youtube, dancing, staring, knitting, watching television, et cetera.

Yesterday was definitely the longest day ever, though. It was my self-appointed day-off from school work, so I woke up at 6:30 to meet Darryl and Eui Yong and Peters for breakfast downtown. I got home around 11:00, power-napped, went to the Dollar Store and Loblaws with my mom to pick up random edible decorating items (candy canes, cranberries, etc.), went home, and took another nap. A few hours later (like at 8:00, having had no food that day other than breakfast), I left for Korean Grill with a friend from school while doing a bit of spy work.

While there was nothing particular un-fun about yesterday, I was all too delighted to stay in and laze around today.
...aaaand that's what I've done.

Have a great weekend, e'erbody!

Home!

It feels like somebody keeps pressing a "Pause" button on my Toronto life when I leave, and I go back to school and live a whole other life and feel grown up because I never have to be back at any certain time and I have words like "Metro" and "Dépanneur" incorporated into my daily vocabulary and I am in charge of when I sleep and what I eat; and when I have a long weekend or an extra break, I'll take a train (which maybe doubles into a time machine) and go back to High School Jess who has parents calling her at 6:00, asking her if she'll be back for dinner, and turns the key and pushes the door open to see someone else there.

Whew. That was a run-on sentence.

I highly suggest anyone who is able to, to go downtown (Toronto) to see the Christmas windows within the next few days, when the weather is still relatively bearable and the snow is white and crisp.

Last night, around 11:00 when everyone was asleep, I made Apple Cinnamon tea and sat in front of the television watching The Daily Show.

I don't think I'll be ready to go back to Montreal in a while.

A Case Of You

I'm sick of myself.

Let's hear about your weeks.

Procrastination.

So I've got two essays to write based on thousands of readings I must be able to draw on, interview three different transportation agencies, and record those interviews in a script/clip split page script to be prepared for filming.

and what am I doing?

An Excercise, if you will.

Beauty is:
little old ladies in oversized coats
that Harry Potter scene where he's walking across the blizzard-y courtyard (the one that looks like The Quad)
underground societies
the sickening green jealousy that rears its ugly head at any great perfect line of poetry.
a crowded couch and a cheesy movie, every night.
the mess behind me
"The Internet started out as a government military device to release information.... do you think they really anticipated YouTube?"
Sailing Into The Mystic
the competitiveness of Top Friends on Facebook
tangerine shafts of light at 1:32 AM
the potentiality of colour.
the precise measurement and planning of the perfect snow fort.
Mittens and Kittens
not the actual store window of Ogilvy, but the idea behind it.
"Star, star, teach me how to shine" transitions (Swell Season, last Thursday!)
stalking rock stars.
The Irish
"China Propaganda" calendar - 2008!
the numbers, the numbers, the daunting old numbers.
onomatopoeia
&
fin.

You know the moment in the music, between the downbeats,
where everything you've ever experienced comes together to fit perfectly like pieces in a puzzle?

The piano sang out the nine million raindrops hitting the cold rough concrete.

A newspaper angled to the skies,
praying for mercy, dangling by fingertips of
the women
with the sprayed hair
and the ivory teeth
(brighter than 88 keys)
and the bitten nails.

Carols drip with the rain
hung with contradictory spells of too many seasons.

The ants are hiding; waiting for the sun
the leather shoe peeping out of the corner

you can hear it
you can hear it
and
you can feel it.

and all this
because life is not a
red wheelbarrow sparkling in the rain,
it's the impatient child,
red and yellow,
daring you to

run.

The First One, All Over Again

Does anyone ever feel really silly doing this? During my avid Blogging days (back in grades 8 and 9 where I thought my heartbroken soul actually had things to say), I was unstoppable, always ready to pipe out line after line of drippy, but nevertheless present, e-gold. And now, I'm here in University, still sans boyfriend, along with other things (like my sanity? Uhhh, yes).
So this leads me to my question: why another attempt at this e-journaling thing? Did I not learn the lesson with climbintheback.blogspot.com, the last untouched brainchild of absolute boredom? Clearly, my ambition (and not to mention, procrastination) has gone the extra mile, leaving my brain slowly heaving along.

So hi. Here I am, blogger.

Let's talk about the last few days:
Christmas is approaching, and it's becoming more evident in the city of Montreal. No snow as of yet, but the shoppers emerge from over-dressed downtown stores with a renewed joy and bigger shopping bags. I've found that I can no longer stay in shopping districts for too long because the sight of people finding so much falsified happiness in material items a little depressing. But then again, I'm the one ambling into any store with a "Jusque 50% Solde!" sign, so what does that say about me?

I'm also spending too much money on alcohol and less time on homework, which is getting me nervous because exams begin unsettlingly soon. I'm a little too comfortable here, I think - I'm still in that mindset of, "Oh, if I just do the required homework then I'll be fine." which I don't quite think will cut it. On the plus side, I haven't failed anything yet; nor do I skip classes. So, I mean, here's hoping, right?

In other news, I have plans for next year pretty much all figured out --- sharing a house with three people who don't irritate me, hopefully downtown near a Metro station. You'll soon learn about them; but that is not for now.

I watched Memoirs of a Geisha two nights ago and am very proud of the three Chinese leading ladies; but also a little unsettled that they played Japanese parts. There's no WWII beef on my part or anything (although I can see the level of disrespect about that), but it's not terribly hard to spot differences between Japanese and Chinese people; and the accents! Gong Li and Zhang Ziyi barely have English down and they were forced to do it all in Japanese accents? Strange-o! Not terribly impressed with how that turned out. However, still a beautifully shot movie and a sweet story line. I have heard many fans of the book express their disappointment in the movie; so I think I'll attempt to tackle the book and decide for myself which one I like best. With me, though, it's generally the books that get the more votes; so we'll see.

This week, I'll be trying to finish my Shakespeare essay once and for all and getting my CV together so I can apply for a call centre job (one of the few job opportunities I'm limited to, since I have such little work experience and can't speak French). Not sure how that'll all turn out, but we'll hope for the best.

But for now, it's 1:23 and I feel like hot chocolate and hot lovin' (or just some time in my bed to read).

Good night!